So here’s the deal — I have no idea where this thing will take me. To be completely honest, I created this blog to help me through this marathon that is life. I’ve journaled before in therapy, but I’m getting this sudden urge to actually share my story and experiences… Or maybe this is just a terrible idea. Welp, there’s only one way to find out!
I’ve decided to title this blog “Stumbling but Holding On” mainly because I needed a title, but also because I feel like this describes quite accurately how my life has played out thus far. When one thing trips me up, I muster up all the strength I can get, try to stand, fail because I forget that I’m actually useless without God’s strength, pray for that strength that I desperately need, and then slowly but surely rise again… and then proceed to trip on something else… But you know what? I’M STILL HERE!!! Take that Satan! I’m here, and I’m here to stay!
I want share with you one of my favorite pictures. It was taken just a few days after I was discharged from a treatment center. You know you’ve got big problems when you’re sent to rehab, but I’ll revisit that topic later. As a way to celebrate being back home, my family did the only logical thing: leave again! Except this time we were all together. Both my parents LOVE skiing and at the time I didn’t really know what to do with my life and all my free time, so we all drove on up to Big Bear! As we were pulling into the driveway of the one of the local bed & breakfasts, a blizzard rolled in. It was my first snow. Needless to say, I was ecstatic. Leaving the treatment center and returning home for the first time in 45 days was nice and all, BUT SNOW! Leave it to me to be more excited about the weather than a monumental turning point in my life. Why did I tell this story? I don’t know, but I like it. I feel like the story and picture describe my personality in some strange way I can’t understand; it speaks to me, whatever that means.
Anyway, I leave you with my favorite scripture:
“Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds!” -Luke 12:24
You are loved. You are valued. You are taken care of.